Tag Archive | Pain

I want my life back! :(

My days are full of pain – sometimes bearable and many times debilitating. Pain takes up all my energy, meaning that it’s difficult to get through the day without a nap. I want to do things and make the days ‘productive’ – especially as I’m in uni. I always feel guilty on my bad days because I know that I should be studying but I just can’t concentrate when I’m in so much pain. Every single day is a struggle, a battle with my body and a fight to stay awake and active – making uni more difficult .

But the worst thing is that I have to get up everyday (though I feel like going back to bed) and get through the day with a fake smile and pretend everything is ‘FINE’ – when I really am struggling. I just want this to end and wish that I could have my life back 😥 There are day when I cry myself to sleep, or I start the day with tears.

I cannot remember what it feels like to live without pain…

Walking has become much harder, uneven and painful and everything requires much more effort. So I tire out much more easily but then at least I get a few hours of relief… as soon as I fall asleep my pain stops (thank god for that).

I’m sick and tired of all this pain, it’s restricting me and taking over my life!! 😦

Aches that won’t go away…

The pain has come again. I’m sick of it.

 Last year I had a little accident in which I missed a step when I went on a zip-line. As I was strapped to a harness my body jerked up causing pain on my hip and therefore leg. I had x-rays done which didn’t seem to spot any problems. So I was referred to physio which was where they found that my pelvis was dislocated. There and then I had it manipulated and I was in no pain at all for he following few months. 🙂

About 3 weeks ago the pain started again, this time it was  worse –  in both hips and both legs. This time I went to a specialist physio.  My appointment was an hour long and I had a full physical examination. I was told that the reason behind my pain was a lack of exercise, bad posture as well as wearing the wrong type of shoes. So, I was given several exercises to do everyday in order to keep stretching and strengthening my hip and leg muscles.
I really don’t understand what is wrong with me because I am doing everything that I was told to – I walk everywhere, I’m doing the exercises everyday, I’m walking for an hour once a week and I’ve bought the proper walking shoes which were recommended by the physio. It’s a real pain – both physically and mentally! 😦
I wake up in pain and go to sleep in pain. It’s so horrible!
And what’s even worse is , I went to the doctor’s today and I got no help at all. I was told that there is nothing that can be done. I felt really sad and angry as I can’t take the pain anymore. I’m also worried about my future as I will be going to uni this September and the pain will make uni even harder. Also, my parents have been saying that I am too young to be experiencing great amounts of pain and I cannot be taking painkillers all the time. Can anyone relate to this? I would be extremely grateful if anyone has any recommendations of what you do to try and ease the pain.

Experiencing more pain recently than ever…

Recently I have been feeling very tired and experiencing a lot of tightness in my muscles, especially in my calves because of the way I walk. About a year ago, I had the same problem so I went to physio and I was told to do some stretches everyday in order for my muscles to grow properly (as my body was growing, but not my calf muscles). To be honest, I started doing them everyday for a few weeks, but it came to a point where I either forgot or was too tired and not bothered to do them. After a month or so, I was fine and wasn’t experiencing any pain…

However, several months ago my CP really started to annoy me. My right leg (weak side) was really hurting and so it limited me from doing what I wanted to do. I had to lie down and ‘massage’ my leg as it wouldn’t go away. I’ve also been feeling incredibly tired and found it hard to make it through a day without taking a nap – I never used to take naps when I was younger! This got me thinking, will everyday tasks get harder with age? Will I be experiencing more pain as I get older?

Only after walking a fairly short distance, which caused no pain before, I now feel really lethargic and my right leg just sort of ‘gives up’ on me. However, I always try to ignore the pain and carry on.

But, after a few days, I can’t take the pain anymore! I get mad to think that I’m always so tired and I have no energy as well as sad to think that I am limited and restricted to things that I would like to do – if this is now, how will I be in thirty or forty years time?